HOW CAN YOU ACHIEVE YOUR FULL POTENTIAL?

There is a definition of potential that I really love – existing in possibility. But most of us don’t live that way, do we? According to a university study 92% of us never achieve our goal. I wonder if women usually don’t even think in these terms. If you listened to my podcast interview with advisor Reesa Manning, you may have noted my surprise at her accomplishments. I was familiar with her resume, but the real story was in the details. How did a single mom with only a high school education turn a frozen yogurt store into a powerhouse franchise? In 5 years??

What do you need to get there?

No one tells us how to live our life, but there is huge social pressure to conform and take the well-traveled path. And you have other obstacles to clear before you can even envision the possibilities. So, reaching your full potential isn’t easy! American psychologist Abraham Maslow’s self-actualization theory “Hierarchy of Needs” may be helpful in understanding the challenges. His model divides basic human needs into three groups – basic needs, psychological needs, and self-fulfillment needs. The reasoning is that you must meet the lower deficiency needs before you can focus on growth needs such as self-fulfillment. 

If you remember our prior discussion on wellbeing and the Golden Triangle of Happiness you might recall that having close personal relationships, a sense of purpose and financial control seemed to be the key to reaching an on-going state of wellbeing. So, mastering basic financial concepts and having a clear idea of your financial situation make it possible to dream big and actually follow through. That certainly was true in Reesa’s case where taking charge of her financial future led to two amazing career paths.

Does attitude matter? 

Stanford psychologist, Carol Dweck writes about the relationship between a growth mindset and potential in her book “Mindset: The New Psychology for Success”. She theorizes that our view of mistakes as failures results in a “fixed mindset”. This fear of failure puts a limit on personal growth. On the other hand, those with a growth mindset push through challenges and eventually succeed. The good news is you can change your mindset. The limiting fixed mindset will always be in your head, but you have a choice. So, don’t listen to it – because by moving forward and embracing the challenges the possibilities will begin to feel endless. 

Where does money fit in?

Billionaire Richard Branson said “Too many people measure how successful they are by how much money they make or the people that they associate with. In my opinion, true success should be measured by how happy you are.” However, women are at a disadvantage due to the gender pay and gender wealth gaps so I wouldn’t discount money altogether. I view reaching your full potential as a well-rounded state. Having financial control, life balance and adequate attention to your physical and mental health sets the stage for exploring all your amazing possibilities.

How do you start?

“Keep your thoughts positive because your thoughts become your words. Keep your words positive because your words become your behavior. Keep your behavior positive because your behavior becomes your habits. Keep your habits positive because your habits become your values. Keep your values positive because your values become your destiny.” — Mahatma Gandhi

Focusing on the big picture is the first step of the Lady Money program. I talk about clarifying your values and using them as a compass when making important decisions, financial or otherwise. This helps you prioritize how you spend your time, what relationships you pursue and the career and/or purposeful activities you choose. Gandhi has mapped out the critical role of maintaining a positive attitude. A few tips I have found useful are:

• Create a Positive Morning Ritual: What if you leaped out of bed each morning with excitement and purpose? Whether it is playing a theme song of inspirational music, doing something that makes you happy or reflecting on the day ahead, getting off to the right start can make all the difference.
• Make Positive Thinking a Habit: Our brains have a big job and positive thinking actually increases productivity, attention span, problem solving and creativity. Negative thoughts, on the other hand, slows brain coordination, makes thought processing difficult and triggers the fear factor. How do you turn things around? Practice. Start thinking, speaking, and acting positively even if you don’t believe it at first. In time, it will become a habit and you and your brain will benefit from the power of positive thinking.
• Reject Negative Thinking: Even positive people experience negative thoughts. But with a little effort you can short circuit them. Some sort of cue can be helpful. Keep a special picture on your phone, wear a piece of meaningful jewelry or memorize an inspirational phrase you can recite. Whatever it is, use the cue to shift from a negative perspective to a positive one.  After a while you can go one step further and start transforming a challenge into an opportunity. 
• Keep a Gratitude Journal: Humans are wired to put more weight on negative rather than positive experiences. Taking time each day to appreciate some of the things you are grateful for helps balance the scale. Some people keep a gratitude journal or perhaps it’s a little mental reflection before you fall asleep at night. 

So, reaching your full potential is more of a way of life than the ultimate accomplishment. Maybe living life to the fullest, however you define that, is a better way of looking at it. Helping women explore their potential is one of the primary goals of Lady Money. In my experience, being disengaged from money, limits the possibilities. For women, this is often the final piece of the puzzle. Taking financial control frees you to soar.